


Haru is Not a Goldfish

by Miaou Jones (miaoujones)



Category: Free!
Genre: Friendship, Love, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-21
Updated: 2013-12-21
Packaged: 2018-01-05 08:53:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1091995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/miaoujones/pseuds/Miaou%20Jones
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Haru isn't a goldfish. Makoto knows that and Rin knows he knows, but he's not sure Makoto understands what he's really saying.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Haru is Not a Goldfish

**Author's Note:**

> A little something for Makoto/Rin shippers everywhere, in honor of MakoRin Week. ♥

Makoto is outside when Rin gets to his house, kneeling in the corner of the yard. He doesn't seem to know anyone is there, let alone that it's Rin, and Rin thinks about going back the way he came, coming again later or maybe not at all...

A breeze ruffles the leaves overhead, the grass, the flowers in the jar, Makoto's hair.

Rin takes a deep breath and walks across the yard, trying to make a sound so Makoto will be alerted to his presence, but somehow his feet insist on moving quietly. He doesn't want to do something inelegant like clear his throat when he gets there—and fortunately he doesn't have to: the sun catches him so his shadow falls across the ground in front of Makoto, who looks up, shielding his eyes against the light as he focuses. "Rin!" 

A smile dawns across his face and he starts to get up, but Rin is quicker to kneel down. Before Makoto can question him, Rin says, "You do this every week, right?" Makoto nods. Rin means to say more but it's hard for him to take the openness of Makoto's expression right now so he looks away, latching onto the tiny headstone when his gaze falls to it.

They kneel quietly for a while. Rin lets his mind go blank, feeling the sunlight and the breeze, the press of the ground beneath him, letting himself feel instead of thinking.

He looks up when he feels Makoto move beside him and their eyes meet. He's not sure if he's ever looked at Makoto like this, from below. It's something Haru has seen a lot, Rin is sure, and for a moment he even thinks Makoto is going to hold out his hand—but he only smiles and steps back, and Rin gets to his feet.

As they're walking towards the house, Rin hears himself say, "Haru isn't a goldfish, you know." He looks over.

"I know," Makoto says when their eyes meet this time.

Rin comes to a stop and Makoto does too. When Rin doesn't say anything, Makoto says, "I do know, Rin," but Rin doesn't think he really does. "I know he won't die if I'm not around to take care of him. I just..."

He looks away and words unspoken hang between them. The air gets heavy, not just with Makoto's unfinished sentence but with the things Rin came here to say.

"It's okay that you love him that much," Rin blurts out. He pushes on before he can talk himself out of it: "Just, you know—" And then he pauses, not sure how to say this; he had kind of hoped it would be obvious that Makoto _does_ know, so he wouldn't have to say it. "There are other kinds of love..."

It's really not what he meant to say. Nothing is coming out right. It was a mistake to come here—"I'm sorry," he says, "I shouldn't have come."

Makoto touches his arm lightly before dropping his hand. He's smiling again when Rin looks at him. "No, it's okay. I think I understand. And it really is okay—I want Haru to be happy, you know? And I want you to be happy, too. So yeah, don't worry about me."

Rin looks at Makoto's smile and feels his words sink in, and it's all he can do not to slap himself. "No, that's not what I—" He closes his eyes. "Never mind." He opens them again, meeting Makoto's briefly before he turns. "I'll be going now." He feels so stupid for coming here; he doesn't know why he thought this was going to work.

He's a step away when Makoto says his name; two steps away when he feels Makoto's hand close around his wrist. He looks up from that hand and Makoto is right there, so close; and then closer still, and even as he turns his face up Rin lets his eyes fall shut because Makoto is too close, and not close enough—

"Rin~" 

It's more a breath drifting across him than a word and Rin inhales deeply. He wants to open his eyes and he doesn't want to; he doesn't know what he wants—and he does know.

He finds Makoto by touch, just touching their mouths together. It's Makoto who opens and breathes, and Rin takes this breath too, and then he slips along their mingled breaths, touching Makoto inside...

Their foreheads rest against one another when the kiss breaks.

Then Rin steps back; Makoto doesn't.

The sun is warm, the breeze gentle, the ground solid underfoot. He looks at Makoto looking at him, smiling at him, and he doesn't soar, he doesn't float, he feels steady like he rarely has before.


End file.
